The Enlightened (Entitled Book 2) Read online

  “I’m fine,” I growl, leaning my head back on the black leather seat. “My eyes feel like shit though.” To be honest, I feel like death. So I close my eyes hoping to relieve them. And there she is, my Kitten. My eyes snap open. “What the fuck, man. Why is my girlfriend on the roof?”

  David looks up, then over at me. “Do you want to use the phone? Otherwise, I’m taking you to a hospital.” His voice is filled with concern.

  “No fucking way. No hospitals. Take us to the Wynn. Why the fuck would I need a phone? Tess is here.” I punch the top of the car then apologize because I have never been violent with Tess before. She’s pissed of course but tells me the words that I need to hear.

  “I love you, Reed, and I love our baby.” It’s so clear, I look at David somewhat embarrassed to hear her confess that in front of him. But he seems like he hasn’t heard her. His eyes are on the road. My insides are so hot, so filled with love for her it’s burning out of me like lava spilling out of a volcano.

  “David? I should forgive her, right? You heard her say she loves our baby?”

  “Reed, man, I think you should close your eyes and let Tess be with you. We’re almost in town.” His voice is calm and he has a point. Why talk? After all we’ve been through, we need to sleep.

  “Hey, can you turn down the air? It’s freezing in here. I don’t want Tess getting sick you know.” My teeth are chattering and I hear nothing but Tess. Her beautiful, raspy voice is telling me she loves me.

  “How long has he been out?” My body jerks to Jax’s voice.

  “His friend checked him in late this morning. Both of his feet are severely burned. We’re working on getting the infections under control, which will stop the fever from getting any higher. Besides his feet, he had glass embedded in his chest that had to be removed. We did numerous stitches. He’s on an antibiotic drip and morphine for the pain.”

  An annoying beeping vibrates through my brain.

  “How long has he been talking to his girlfriend?” Jax sounds agitated. I wish I wanted to open my eyes and talk to my brother. I need to tell him that Tess is with me now. Her beautiful face smiles at me.

  An unknown speaker breaks my train of thought. “He’s been talking off and on to a Tess and his baby? Does he have a baby?”

  “No.” Jax sounds unhappy. Now I really want to open my eyes, but I’m floating.

  “Reed?” Jax’s voice fully awakens me. My eyes find his, and I can’t help but smile. He looks like shit, tired and grumpy.

  “What the fuck?” My voice sounds like a stranger’s. My brain feels like it needs to be rebooted. I look around and see whiteish walls, a large window, and a chair. A bulky bag sits in the corner. I try to sit up. “Seriously, what the fuck?” The smell of disinfectant or Lysol wakes my brain up and makes my nose twitch.

  “Relax. Don’t start going crazy again.” Jax pushes me back down.

  I’m surprised how easily I fall back. My whole body is weak. “What’s happened?”

  “You’re in a hospital in Las Vegas, Reed. Your friend David called me. Apparently you gave him my phone number. No, wait.” He holds up a finger. “That’s not true. He told me Tess gave him my number! Are you kidding me? You’re so fucked up that you hallucinated Tess. You’ve been having long, lengthy conversations with her all day,” he hisses.

  “What are you talking about?” I try to get my brain to work.

  “What have you done?” he demands, his voice taking on an edge.

  And like someone flips on a light, my heart burns and agony rolls over me.

  Sitting up, I try not to throw up as the room spins. I blink. “Call the nurse. Get the doctor to discharge me.” The gravel in my throat seems to have changed my voice.

  Jax glares at me like he’s trying to decide if he should have me committed then sighs as he pinches the top of his nose. “Reed, talk to me. Where is Tess? She’s not answering her phone. You were talking some crazy shit…”

  “Tess is dead.”

  His face pales and blurs. “What?” He pulls out his phone, his eyes frantic.

  “No, not dead, dead. She’s pregnant, Jax.” I snort, blinking to clear my eyes. “Or she was.” I choke on the words.

  “What are you saying?” He looks around the room as if he needs help. “I’m not letting you leave the hospital until you make sense.”

  “She aborted it, Jax!” I yell as he takes a step back. “Killed it! My baby because she was too scared to be a mom.” I turn my head, not able to look at my brother. Tess’s sin is so awful, I can’t bear to see the pity in his eyes.

  “Reed.” He steps toward me, his hands gripping the rail on the bed. “Explain yourself. You left Tess pregnant in New York?” His voice is slow, almost as if he can’t believe it.

  “Jesus, Jax, yes I left!” I strain my eyes, trying to see outside the door for a doctor or nurse—someone to get me out of here. All I see is a couple holding hands, whispering in the hallway.

  “She aborted our baby. She’s that weak.”

  Jax stares at me.

  “What? Can’t defend her on that, huh?” I sneer at him.

  “Why would you leave her?” He sounds incredulous, making me feel like an ass. “This is Tess we’re talking about.”

  He starts to pace “You know she needs time to ease into situations. She must be in shock. Christ, Reed.” He looks at the ceiling then spins on me. “Did you rage out and leave her pregnant and alone?” His voice is loud and accusatory.

  I leap out of bed and collapse. The pain in my feet is excruciating.

  Jax moves toward me, but I hold up my hand to stop him. “Are you fucking kidding me?” I say, using the rail to get to my feet. The sting is so unbearable I should sit. But truthfully it’s a welcome distraction from the agony in my heart. “You’re taking her side over mine?” My eyes blur. “Jesus, you’re my brother.” I may pass out. Not from physical pain but from the betrayal.

  “No!” he snaps “But what the hell, Reed? You of all people know how she gets. She’s holed up in your penthouse scared.” Frustration oozes out of him.

  And I snap. Literally, I hear something in my head snap. “Shut up, Jax.” I collapse back onto the shitty hospital bed. Jax’s words have made me physically ill. “You weren’t there. She. Didn’t. Want. It!”

  I roll my head back on the plastic-encased hospital pillow. It throbs, my heartbeat pounding through my skull. I place my arm over my eyes. Darkness is all I want to see.

  “Just leave, Jax.” What the hell is happening to me? My stomach cramps. I need more pain meds. I lift my arm and look at my brother. He’s a fraud and he’s in love with Tess.

  Jax scrubs his hands over his face and drops them. “Reed you’re upset. I shouldn’t have said anything.” From the sound of his voice, he’s still judging me; his eyes look wary as they dart from me to the hallway.

  “Get the fuck out of here and out of my life.” The poison has taken over my brain. Jax loves Tess. How did I not see it? I clench my fist into the shitty starched hospital sheets. “Go home. Tell Mom and Dad I’ll contact them when I get situated.” I sound out of breath.

  He simply stands and stares like I’m the insane one. “I’m tired, Reed. I need a shower and a nap. I’ll be back later.” His voice is full of disgust.

  I push myself up, so fucking weak my body shakes with the effort.

  Jax sighs and closes his eyes as if he’s trying to get control of himself. Finally, he says,

  “You need to come home to Tess. Work this out, beg her to forgive you. Because if you don’t, you will never forgive yourself. You love her. And yes, you’re right. I’m protective of her. She’s like a sister to me. You tell me you got her pregnant and left her alone? How would you expect me to react?”

  “Beg her?” This time I do stand, and adrenaline fuels my body. “You should be happy I’m gone. You’ve been panting after her like a dog waiting for her to go into heat,” I spit.

  Jax looks at me like I’ve slapped him. “Reed!” His
nostrils are flaring, but he takes a step toward me. “You’re sick, so I’m going to pretend you did not say that. You need to shut the fuck up before you say something you’ll regret.”

  I take a step forward vaguely processing that I’m in a hospital gown and the floor is cold even with my bandaged feet.

  “Fuck you.” I push him. He doesn’t move, so I use my words. “I always knew you loved Tess. Always so concerned with upsetting her. Making sure she is happy. Lying for her when you knew she was in the wrong.” I grab ahold of the bar behind me as my legs wobble.

  “She’s a bad person. A murderer,” I whisper.

  He flinches, so I continue. He needs to know the truth. “She played you, Jax. She played me too. But I have seen her for what she is. You still defend her.” My dizziness is threatening to take me down, but I don’t care—I hope it does. Because even as these words leave my mouth, they are only words. My heart still beats for her. I love her and I hate that. It makes me want to reach inside my chest and rip out my heart to get some relief.

  “This is the drugs talking.” He snaps me back.

  My body keeps shaking, sweat pouring down my rib cage. I feel moisture all the way to my feet. Looking at Jax reminds me of who I used to be. I need him gone… maybe forever.

  So I tell him, “Drugs? You feel guilty because you want to fuck Tess.”

  Jax takes a step back almost as if he’s afraid of me or maybe afraid of the truth of my words. It’s getting hard for me to focus on him. My eyes are definitely blurry.

  “Don’t get me wrong. She has the sweetest-tasting pussy. And the things I taught her to do with her mouth and tongue. A fucking pro would have a hard time beating her at sucking cock…” I’m falling. Unfortunately, Jax hasn’t hit me although he does have me pinned at the neck, his strong hand squeezing.

  “Just fucking stop. You’ve made your point. You want to disappear? Fuck you! You have a whole family that loves you. Tess loves you!” His hand tightens and I wish he would make me black out.

  I’m tired, thoroughly exhausted. Someone is screaming at us. I think it’s a nurse. And blackness is upon me.

  TESS

  Past – twenty-one years old

  New York, NY

  My phone is ringing again. “God, make it stop,” I yell at no one because I’m alone. I have given up thinking it’s Reed. He has been gone for fourteen days and nine hours. I could rattle off the minutes, but I’m too exhausted, although merely thinking about Reed makes my face boil.

  “Asshole,” I yell again. I’ve found if I scream, I don’t cry and that helps—I need to get myself together. Today is the day. I slide my fingers through my straightened hair. Without any judgment I look at myself. I’m pale, gaunt, with eyes that look too big and have dark circles beneath them. I roll them and search around my makeup case for some dark plum lipstick. My cheeks are so pale that even when I put blush on I look like a streetwalker in the 1800s. Sighing, I guess I should put on some mascara and more concealer too.

  Deeming myself presentable, I grab my new oversized camel cardigan, Prada bag, and my giant pair of Chanel sunglasses. Even putting my arms in my cardigan sleeves is a chore. Pushing for the elevator, I turn toward the annoying buzz of my phone. Frowning at it, I decide I should probably bring it in case of an emergency. I’m back to blaming my phone for all bad things that have happened to me. Only now I’m twenty-one, soon to be twenty-two, getting ready to make the biggest decision of my life. As our private elevator takes me down, my fingers scroll through all my missed calls. Most of them are from Dr. Miller and my new doctor. My sad excuse of a mother made one call but didn’t leave a message. More than likely, she was trying to call someone else. I suck on my bottom lip as I see a bunch from Jax and Caroline. Great! I’m not ready to face them. Caroline is Reed and Jax’s mom, yet she feels more like mine than my biological one. I rub my forehead as my stomach does a flip. Did Reed tell them? Do they hate me? Is that why they are calling? The elevator opens and I’m almost too terrified to step out. What if they are waiting? I’ve pretty much been a hermit, staying in our penthouse, waiting for Reed to return. Because there is no way he wouldn’t. He promised to love me no matter what! No matter what. But he lied. That makes me put one foot in front of the other. Peter, one of the daytime doormen, smiles as I pass. He’s always so happy. Half the time I feel guilty talking to him since I never have anything good to say.

  “Good morning, Miss Gallagher, can I get you a cab?” He comes around from the marble desk. I don’t belong with the happy. I belong to the dark, depressed, wounded, and broken. Make no mistake, that’s what I am.

  “Tess?” His voice brings my eyes back to his kind hazel ones.

  “Sorry… yes, Peter. I need a cab.” I glance over at the woman who is watering and tending the plants. Even she smiles at me. When did New Yorkers start to smile?

  “I’ll get right on it.”

  “Thanks.” I force myself to return her smile before I bring my phone back to my face trying to block out both of their good vibes.

  “Tess?” I jump almost dropping my phone.

  He frowns. “Sorry, are you okay?” I notice that he has a cab and is waiting for me to get in. I put my phone in my bag. I puff out some air and push my hair off my face. “I’m a little tired.”

  He nods. “Listen, if you need anything, please don’t hesitate to ask.” He holds my elbow gently like I’m an old lady. “You have a great day.” His chipper voice makes me bite my lip. I sink into the seat.

  “By the way, you look really pretty today, even tired.” He flashes me a big grin. Thankfully he shuts the door, so I don’t have to engage. I rub my temples. My head hurts. What I wouldn’t give to take four Advil. But Advil is on the “no” list, along with coffee and sushi, wine, whiskey…

  “Where to?” the cab driver asks. I rattle off the address of this apparent god of an obstetrician and sit back. If only I could turn my mind off for even a minute. I try to concentrate on the grayness of Manhattan, the hundreds of people on the streets. The horns and smells that I truly wish I didn’t smell. I hope I don’t throw up in this guy’s cab. I already purged my breakfast. After some deep calm breaths, I will the nausea away.

  I look down at my thin hands—they’re shaking. If only I had the strength to follow through with what I told Reed I needed to do. A small, sad sigh escapes me. I’m all alone, and I’m scared. I’m about to face the truth—the real truth: I’m not going to abort. I can’t. It’s all I have of him.

  The cabbie swerves quickly to the curb forcing me to grab ahold of the handle and glare at him as my stomach tries to catch up.

  “How much?” Yes, I sound like a bitch, but I couldn’t care less. He mumbles something degrading. I’m too tired to participate, so I toss him a fifty and slam the door. This is one of the many reasons I need to leave New York. As soon as Brance gets back from Africa, I intend to.

  Somehow, I make it to the expensive but welcoming doctor’s office without having to make a pit stop to throw up. The calm celery-colored walls and soothing music seem to help my terror.

  I’m told to pee in a cup then sit and they will call me in shortly. Crossing my legs, I try not to stare at the woman who sits across from me. She looks far along and she’s crying. Her husband appears terrified as he tries to soothe her.

  I take my phone out of my purse. I can’t help but stare at the flat-screen TV promoting laser treatments. Apparently when you go through menopause you will experience painful sex due to a dry vagina, but with this new treatment, you will be back to your old self.

  Perfect!

  Again, I look over at the woman. Her husband is being supportive as he rubs her leg. And the loneliness that I’ve been pushing back grabs me. My eyes dart around. I’m the only one alone. Every other woman has a someone. This can’t be my life. How the hell did this happen?

  “Tess Gallagher?” I stand up, tossing my phone back in my bag. “That’s me.”

  The nurse is wearing Winnie the Pooh scrubs
. She’s older and somewhat intimidating in stature. She instructs me to follow her. I’m bombarded with pictures of happy babies. Literally, they are crawling up the walls. Thank-you cards, Christmas, Hanukkah, you-name-it cards. Jesus, how many babies has he delivered?

  “Sit here.” She’s all business as she silently takes my blood pressure, temperature, and draws blood. At last, she speaks. “When was your last period?”

  “Um a while ago. I can’t remember.”

  Reed knew the day. I’ve purposely blocked it out. She types everything in her laptop, then asks me to step on the scale.

  I stare in shock. “This can’t be right.” I huff.

  “I assure you it is. We get it checked every week. This scale is right on.” She purses her lips. “What is your regular weight?”

  Do I lie? Because yes, I’ve been sick, but ten pounds… That seems like a lot of weight to lose. “Um. I think I usually weigh around a hundred and twenty.”

  She types it. “How tall are you?”

  “Five eight. Again, silence.

  “Is that bad?”

  She looks up and gives me a small smile. “Follow me. Dr. Blumen will see you shortly. Please put on this gown. Everything from the waist down off.”

  Then she’s gone. I rub my arms, all of a sudden cold. I look around the huge room. Another giant TV is mounted on the wall. An ultrasound machine is parked next to the chair with stirrups. There’s a chart of the stages of pregnancy to my left and a giant watercolor of a visibly pregnant woman on my right.

  I undress from the waist down and hop up on the paper-covered table, which crinkles. The white exam paper rips in half as I adjust and wait for the doctor. I’m feeling sick and desperately lonely, so I look down at my hands and start fiddling with my nails, unable to stop my mind from punishing me more. Reed should be here, wanted to be here, begged to be here. And yet here I sit, cold and alone.

  A small knock causes me to jump. A handsome man in his early fifties enters. His eyes twinkle with kindness. He seems like the kind of doctor who’s understanding. I almost burst into tears.